Somewhat stable...

Elizabeth's sleeping patterns have somewhat stabilized and we are able to enjoy most of the afternoons and early evenings with her awake and wanting to be on the couch in the living room. We are so blessed with so many people who love her and want to surround her. Elizabeth is so lucky to be a student at Canterbury E.S. (and only because the incredible principal there Mrs. Parlen really went to the mat for her) with an amazing staff there that pampers Elizabeth, even when she isn't able to make it to school! She has been able to enjoy home visits from her teacher and other people there that she loves and it has made this whole terrible time so much better. One of the things Elizabeth has told us many times is that she is so sick of her body not letting her do the things she wants--one of those things she wants so desperately is to be back in school. The visits from the school staff makes her so happy and she feels like she isn't missing out as much, although she still misses the kids in room 48 all the time. I am so so thankful that she got the opportunity to experience being a student, even though it was really only for about two months. It was a lifelong wish for her, and I can't even express how thankful I am that she was able to realize it.

The last few months have been pretty amazing in that respect... Elizabeth has crammed a lot living into such a short period. She continues to try to do as much as her little deteriorating body will allow even now. In June she was able to participate and dance in her first real ballet recital. She missed the June 2005 recital that she had been scheduled for since her liver resection came up at the same time. We were able to attend it (she was discharged just the day before from her surgery only days earlier), but she couldn't dance and while happy to watch it, was a little saddened that she wasn't dancing. June 2006 was her year to dance. In August we had her Disney Cruise from Make-A-Wish. What amazing memories we all have from that trip! At the end of September she was able to start school for the first time ever. She immediately bonded with the teacher, Mrs. Preis (how did we get such an amazing teacher?!), and the kids in class all wanted to help her and take care of her. The kids are such an incredible bunch, totally empathetic and caring. She made her way into the hearts of the staff, and has touched so many people just by being herself. She won her first school award in November. In October she got to join Girl Scouts and become a Brownie. She has been waiting to be a Brownie ever since her big brother became a Cub Scout when she wasn't even two yet. Finally, she was a scout herself! She met the most adorable and sweet little girls in her troop, centered at Village Christian School in Sun Valley. Troop 144. They got to choose their uniform, and somehow they all agreed on the one Elizabeth liked best: a light blue oxford shirt with brown skort, brown knee highs, and brown sash. Her sash with patches and pins was delivered just last week. What a treasure. The last meeting she was well enough to attend was the first meeting they got to wear their uniforms. Another incredibly special day. The Brownie Moms have been taking care of our family with deliveries of food, gift cards, activities for the boys, and special gifts for Elizabeth. The most valuable thing they have given me is their support and prayers and reassurances that they have all been happy that Elizabeth was a part of their troop. We were always so welcomed, even though Elizabeth didn't attend the same school as the rest of the girls, and we had never even met before. Until October, these ladies and their daughters were strangers to us, and us to them. The way they have completely embraced us has me speechless. I am so so thankful.

My biggest fear has been that by enrolling Elizabeth in school and scouts, especially with her unsure future, was that she would take a turn for the worse and all the kids who she had loved and who loved her would be hurt and damaged by losing her. Every one keeps reassuring me that the kids will be okay and that they are learning valuable life lessons. I hate this. I just want Elizabeth to be okay and to go on living and playing and loving and making new friends. And I love those kids who have been so good to Elizabeth. I hope they will be okay.

Today Elizabeth has eaten less and drank less. She is urinating less. But she is still getting up out of her bed or off the couch and walking around now and then. She scares me! I'm so afraid she'll fall or hurt herself, but she is determined. Today she grabbed me and snuggled up in my arms in her bed. While we lie there, her in my arms, she started to cry a little. When I asked what she was crying about she said don't worry, they aren't sad tears, they are happy tears. Then she said that she is just so happy she has such good doctors and that she was so glad they finally got those stupid drains out. I said I was glad, too. I keep trying to bring up opportunities for her to ask questions or talk about what is going on, but she won't. She just keeps talking about fighting the cancer. Sometimes I wonder if she even has any idea that everyone thinks she is dying. She certainly doesn't seem to think so!

On Monday she had a little tea party get together with her friend MacKenzie. Thank you so much, Teri, and Mac and Maddie and Mallory for making Elizabeth feel so special! They brought the American Girl Place to Elizabeth, complete with doll (which she named Isabelle) and outfits and more. Another wonderfully special day full of memories. I love this family and their girls so much. I love the Durans, too. I hate that these girls and others like them (boys, too) are haunted by cancer.

Please keep praying for Elizabeth's miracle. Thanks for checking in.